Control or Accountability?

I have said many times over the last several years in posts, blogs, live broadcasts, zoom calls, mentoring sessions, and from various pulpits in relation to working with other Kingdom Leaders effectively it requires that they must walk the the “three mutuals.” (to which anyone that knows me or follows me can attest)

Mutual Accountability

Mutual Honor

Mutual Submission

There is no way humanly possible to work together and walk together without these “three mutuals.” I believe that most folks understand this to be true and understand what accountability, honor, and submission all mean.

Here of late I have noticed an alarming trend among some where accountability is being conflated (to combine two or more separate things, especially pieces of text, to form a whole) with control. Nothing could be further from the truth. Even the definitions of the two words bear that out.

Control - the power to influence or direct people's behavior or the course of events…to determine the behavior or supervise the running of.

Accountability - the quality or state of being accountable

especially…an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one's actions; liable, answerable.

If one is operating in true mutual accountability, where they are accountable for their actions; is that the same thing as being under the power or influence of another dictating their behavior? Well Obviously Not! So why are some saying that they are being controlled when they are just being held accountable?

I agree that there have been some movements in church leadership that got way out of balance, like the shepherding movement, back in the 70’s and 80’s. It got so extreme one had to clear every decision with their leader, for example…who to marry or date, which job to take, what color car to buy…every decision one would make had to be cleared by their leader…in essence one’s leader took the place of the leading and guiding of the Holy Spirit. Well Obviously That Was Error!

But is that the same thing as accountability? Is accountability doing what the shepherding movement did? I think not! Not if it is mutual accountability. Not if it is a true covenantal relationship. If the moment one that says they are in covenant with and accountable to others, has those they are accountable to place a demand on that accountability, and the individual runs from the accountability crying control, something is wrong, and there never was accountability.

It seems that the way some folks view accountability these days is that everything is all good as long as you agree with me, but as soon as you don’t and you look to hold me accountable for my actions or decisions, now you have crossed the line and become controlling. These things ought not be!